Change Is the Only Constant

Change happens all around us, all of the time. Children grow, bodies change, seasons shift, relationships evolve and our identities shift. Personally, I rarely find change easy. I know that it is inevitable and not necessarily a bad thing, in fact it is mostly positive. But, I think like most people, I struggle with change. Especially when it's out of my control and seems to take over everything. 

This season of my life has been asking me to meet change more honestly than ever. Some of the changes feel good, refreshing, a new start, an exciting beginning. Some of it feels scary and out of control. I automatically freeze, like a deer in the headlights. I want to resist these changes, to control them or stop it somehow. This effort is fruitless. I’m trying to stabilize what is meant to move — to freeze something that was always designed to evolve. And yet, I can't help but cling to the old version of myself, even if that version of me isn't particularly happy or satisfied with her life. But the familiar feels safe, comforting. In these moments, I need to consciously, actively remember that it's better to grieve what was, to let go of that version of me, and embrace whatever is coming. It probably won't feel good at first. But when I look back at my life, I see all of the obstacles I overcame, the challenges I faced, and I always walked away stronger, smarter, a better version of myself. Sometimes it took awhile to heal and become that better version, but somehow it always worked out. I'm still here and still going.

My path has been anything but linear. There have been ruptures, endings, and chapters I never imagined writing. And yet, I am still here. I still have a lot of work to do on myself: as an individual, as a friend, a mother, a sister, a partner, a yoga teacher, a stranger. 

I also realized that the less I resist, the less I suffer. My resistance is the biggest problem to the changes that are inevitable. When I accept what I cannot control — which, honestly, is most things — something inside me softens.

I still believe that it is entirely ok to grieve what was, to embrace all the feelings that come up with change. Whether that's fear or excitement, sadness or joy, all of these feelings are valid and welcome in my life, in my body. But I need not dwell in them. 

My meditation and yoga practice helps me with this process. 

When I think of my yoga journey, I see how it was never linear. I only ever improved after feeling like I got worse. My biggest breakthroughs came after I felt the tightest, stiffest, in body and mind. What a beautiful reminder that there's a light at the end of the tunnel, that its the darkest before the dawn.

Not only does yoga provide a parallel to my life as a whole, but it helps me feel grounded in my physical body. I return to the present moment. I can remind myself that I am safe, that everything is ok. That in this exact moment, everything is as it should be. It reminds me to stop regretting things in the past or worrying about what's to come in the future. The present moment is all we ever really have. And if I remember that, I know inherently that there is no need to fear change or to resist it. How beautiful that I can be an entirely new Katie right now, at this moment. I need not identify with the Katie of yesterday or of 5 minutes ago. I can redirect, change course or change my mind, and try something new, a different path. What a relief.

Yoga also gives me the feeling that everything will all be ok. That even if this moment feels unbearable, I somehow have a deep trust in the universe that things will work out. Beyond the asanas (postures) yoga is about unity, its about feeling connected to all that is around you. About oneness, connection, love. And remembering this, I can exhale. 

In my yoga practice, every breath changes, every posture transitions, even stillness moves.

This practice asks me these questions: What if change isn’t the enemy? What if change is actually my teacher? Can I realize that my softness is strength?

And with that, I ask you this: where are you resisting change right now? Can you let one thing move today?